#also also if you havent heard the song i beg of u do it right now

[buildmeaboy]

this might be a hot take (or something , i honestly cant tell what the overall opinion is atm) but I actually really liked the finale. dont get me wrong, it hurt like hell, but as a story beat it was perfect. the only thing i would have changed would be to have love of my life by queen playing during the credits. can you fucking imagine

[strangeradventuresofp]

must have been the wind (five x reader)

A/N : this is HEAVILY inspired by alec benjamin’s song lol if u havent listened to it i suggest u do its so good also five is aged up, 18 as always unless otherwise specified !! hope u enjoy loves<3

Five often roamed the halls of the Umbrella Academy mansion. Probably to remind himself that it wasn’t going to collapse anymore, after him and his siblings managed to stop the apocalypse. It was still so surreal to him, and he really didn’t have much of a clue of what to do with his life, so, he just moped around the various, decked out corridors, unsure of what his purpose was. Mostly, he spent his time in the kitchen or at Griddy’s, either drinking coffee or alcohol. Not so much alcohol anymore; after you shared your dismay with him he -mostly- cut it all out. And, of course, Five spent a fair amount of time with you. He had taken a special liking to you after his brothers, Klaus and Diego, had found you trying to run away from someone in your past. They had brought you here to look after you and keep you safe. This obviously led to you being very close with the two men, and evidently, the rest of the Hargreeves as well. They acted as if they were your big siblings, which you were incredibly appreciative of, as you had never really had a strong bond with your own family. 

Your bond with Five, however, was different. You liked him, and he liked you. Various flirty comments had been made between the two of you, but neither of you ever admitted you liked each other. In fact, you both acted as if you had absolutely zero interest in ever being with each other, but everyone knew that wasn’t true. You had taught him how to make coffee just how he liked it, after he begged you six times a day to brew him some more. You liked to think it was just so he could hang out with you, but you knew that black coffee was his one true love. It wasn’t terribly unlikely though, Five did everything he could to hang out with you.

It was a particularly stormy Monday, and it wasn’t unusual that you and Five were the only two in the house. Luther had accompanied Allison on her shopping trip. Diego was probably trying to fight crime again. Vanya was at violin rehearsal, and nobody ever knew where Klaus was unless he was present in the house. Five was messing with the things on the table in the lobby before he heard a glass smash in one of the bedrooms above him. His brows furrowed in concern and curiousness. He quietly made his way up the stairs, meanwhile hearing gentle sobs coming from your bedroom.

You quickly wiped your face, and turned around to face the open door, with Five stood in the space.

“Y/N? I heard some noises when I was downstairs, I was just wondering if you’re okay?” As you smiled, Five studied your face, noticing how puffy your eyes were, and how red your face was, frowning.

“I think your ears are playing tricks on you. Thanks for caring, Five, it’s really nice of you. I wish I could tell you about the noise, but I.. I didn’t hear a thing. It must have been the wind.” Five didn’t believe a word of what you said, and frowned, eyebrows knitted together in an attempt to figure you out. “Sorry, Five, but I would really like to be on my own right now.” You smiled apologetically before closing your door, leaving him stood outside it, taken aback. Suddenly, a blue flash appeared and Five was stood back in your bedroom.

“Y/N-”

“Are you kidding me? I just told you I wanted to be alone.”

“I’m trying to figure out what’s wrong.”

“What’s your problem, Five?”

“Why won’t you tell me?”

“Because I want to be alone, like I said!” You knew his intentions were good, but it made you upset that he didn’t respect your wishes first time around. He opened his mouth to speak as you pushed him out of your bedroom and closed the door once again. He sighed, and decided he wouldn’t try again, even though he couldn’t bear the thought of leaving you so upset, on your own.

A few moments later you heard the front door open and close, looking out of your window to see him leaving, presumably to get himself a coffee. Even though you had taught him months ago, he still insisted that you make it, because ‘yours just tastes better’. 

It wasn’t long before Five found himself inside the doughnut shop, wanting a black coffee, as always. He was surprised to see his brother, Number Four, already sat at the counter.

“Hey, hey. Ben’s sat there.” Five sighed and took the seat the other side of Klaus and put his head in his hands. “What’s up, brother?”

“Y/N’s upset, and I don’t know why. And I don’t know how to help. And she won’t let me talk to her because she wants to be alone,”

“You gotta respect that she wants some alone time. Try talking to her later.”

“But she’s partly upset with me. I made her mad earlier and I just-” Five sighed, trying to find the right words. “It makes my heart ache to know that she’s upset. It’s like the worst pain I’ve ever felt. And I don’t know how to make her feel better.”

“Just buy her flowers or.. Or a doughnut or something, I don’t know. Just do something that she’ll like.”

“But how am I supposed to-”  As Klaus looked to the side, he saw a quick blue flash and noticed his brother was no longer sat beside him.

“Thanks, Klaus. No problem, Five!” He sighed and looked at Ben. “I don’t get enough credit form you people.”

~~~

A few hours and a hundred tears later, you heard gentle knocking on the wooden door. You mumbled a ‘Come in’ and opened your eyes to see Five stood by your bed, which you were curled up in, holding a cup in one hand and a bag in the other. He noticed your eyes hadn’t gotten any less puffy, and suspected that you had continued crying after he had left your room.

“What do you want, Five?”

“I brought you doughnuts. And some hot cocoa, with marshmallows. I tried to make it how you like it, but you’re always better at that sort of stuff.” He grinned sheepishly as he put them down on your bedside table, and you felt the bed dip as he took a seat beside you. You sat up to face him, frowning.

“You didn’t have to do that.”

“I also bought a few movies I know you really like. I thought we could watch them.”

“We? You don’t like any of the movies I like.”

“I know but.. I thought you might want some company. And I want to apologize for, you know, earlier. I overstepped and I shouldn’t have, and I’m sorry.” As you looked at him, you noticed a shy smile on his face, that brought out his dimple. You smiled, pulling him into a hug. He wrapped his arms around gently, letting out a sigh of relief.

“Thank you, Five.” You placed a gentle kiss to cheek, causing both you and him to gain red cheeks. Five pressed his lips to yours almost immediately, unable to hold his feelings for you any longer. Your mouths moved with each other rhythmically, and as you smiled against his lips, his hand reached up to cup your cheek. The kiss lasted a few minutes before the two of you pulled away from each other, your forehead leaning against his.

“Put the damn movie on.” Smiling, you pushed him away, making room for him on your bed while he started the movie up. He sat beside you, his arm gently rested on your shoulders. You hugged around his waist, listening to his heartbeat. Kissing your forehead, he moved the hair out of your face.

“A pretty girl like you shouldn’t be crying so much. I won’t ask what’s wrong, but I’m always here for you, Y/N. You can tell me anything. Nothing could ever make me think any less of you.” Once again, your lips collided, moving with each other in sync, huffing when he pulled away from you, earning a quiet chuckle from his parted lips.

“Five?” He hummed in response. “What are we?” Your eyes met his as his brows furrowed.

“I don’t know.” You sighed, hoping for a better answer, before he opened his mouth once again. “I like you.”

“I like you too.”

“Be my girlfriend.”

“Okay.” Snuggling more into him, you felt him plant a kiss to your temple and you grinned. 

~~~

“Hey! Guys, you gotta see this! Five and Y/N are spooning!” Klaus shouted to the rest of the house, stood in the doorway of your door.

“Klaus, what are you doing?” Five rubbed his eyes, propping himself up on his elbow, feeling you stir in his sleep beside him. Other footsteps could be heard coming down the corridor as the other siblings piled into the doorway.

“Little Number Five and Y/N.. Who would’ve thought?” Klaus placed his hands on his heart, grinning at you and the boy.

“Um.. Everybody?” Allison giggled as the others in the doorway laughed. Five shushed his siblings, gesturing to you. “Okay, okay. Let’s leave them alone.” Very quickly, the doorway became empty, and the door became closed again, and Five lay back down, facing you, smiling at how adorable you looked.

“Mm.. Five, what are you doing?” Your heavy eyelids pulled themselves open to look at your boyfriend, watching him smile at you.

“You’re just beautiful.”

“Shut up.”

“Make me.” The ends of his lips turned up into a smirk and he kissed you quickly, before pulling away and grinning cheekily. “Make me a coffee?”

my masterlist

A/N : hiihi thanks 4 reading ! i actually rly like this and im proud of it so i hope u guys like it too and i hope u all have a lovely day<3

[spaceysp]

Saying random stuff to feed into the hyperfixations; pick one of these statements to rant about because I wanna read :)) if u want,

How skeppy must feel with everyone meeting up cause BaD JUST COME ON ,

Opinions on bad planning to take skeppy to dinner and all that jazz ,

Skeppys newest video on the skep channel where bad and skeppy are surprisingly sweet to eachother (and how lately in general bad has been less angee with him) ,

Literally the whole discount skeppy situation , bad being literally in love,

Ride with U,,,,,hetero,,,,explanation,,,, anywhere?

ANONNNNN I OWE YOU MY LIFE ILY 

im literally going to talk about all of these so im sorry but read more at your own risk

one: skeppy, i am so sorry a mf does this to you. but seriously, i can only think of a few reasons (that dont sound entirely made for fanfic) that bad keeps putting off meeting skeppy 

1. (the most unlikely) theyve already met and they keep the bit going so the fans dont find out. i can get that they wouldnt want to tell at first because its their own business, but i seriously doubt they would wait very long to confirm it, because ppl honestly can put a lot of pressure and hype on the meetup (esp with skeppy’s “surprise”) so i think theyd release something just so everyone knew that it finally happened! they didnt lie!

2. bad just doesnt want to meet skeppy (actually nvm this is the most unlikely) 

bad seems to be genuinely excited to meet skeppy, even claiming skeppys the one to keep putting it off, not him (which skeppy immediately disproved but) and saying over and over he wants to meet up with him, but always avoiding actually making plans (every single tweet about the meetup) so its clear he does want to meet skeppy eventually, which makes trying to figure out why he wont even harder

3. its not the right time/ waiting for a specific date

leading up to this, i was thinking that there was a pretty good chance theyd meet up on their anniversary, but that never happened rip. the issue is with this is that they guaranteed they would meet up before the end of the year, and at this point theres only one “event” left, but they still dont seem to have any plans to meet. if bad was waiting for the perfect time to do it, why not just tell skeppy to confirm a meetup date? it would get him (and maybe the fans, if they told them) off his back. another variant of this is that there is a set date, but they havent told the public, but again, skeppy seems to be just as much in the dark about this as everyone else

4. health issues 

bads apparently been feeling pretty under the weather lately, with his arm and kidney stones, its very plausible (and reccomended, imo) that bad doesnt want to travel when hes having these problems. of course, skeppy could visit, but he could either not want to spend their time together sick or the plans they have could also be too straining. i think this is probably one of the most likely atm, go see a doctor bbh im begging you

5. bads nervous

this is also one of the more plausible to me. for whatever reason, bads just anxious about it, whether it wont be the same as talking online, or be super awkward or whatever, he could just keep putting it off for that (its still weird and kinda doesnt make sense but in a more realistic way this time)

i know i totally went off track but this brings me to my point, skeppys kinda just waiting for bads confirmation at this point, so seeing his friends have fun meeting up is probably just lowkey depressing and i could see him using it as more the reason they should meet up. really the only thing he can do in this situation(at least, as far as i can tell) is what he has been doing, annoy bad about it or he take advantage of bads jealousy and meet up with someone else. the other option is to randomly come to his house, but it doesnt seem like skeppy is gonna do that, maybe to respect his boundaries? if he was planning on it i think he wouldve done it by now

OKAY NUMBER TWO LETS GO

this kinda ties into my point in the “reasons why bad wont meet skeppy” thing, that bad seems really excited to meet him yet still wont?? its clear he really values any time spent with skeppy, but he also make sure skeppys having a good time too! that why he never does any actual work with skeppy around (i.e. building statues or gathering materials for such), he knows its boring so instead theyll wander around the server telling stupid stories or punching each other off stairs for 20 minutes. im sure itll be the same irl, he mentioned wanting to meet somewhere like a nature reserve or amusement park, probably to make sure theres never a dull moment or time wasted. dinner seems much more low-key, and i wouldnt be surprised if bad just wanted to have an excuse to try and impress him with a nice totally-platonic date

NUMbeR tHree *airhorns* 

they really do be the best of friends! ive noticed that skeppys def been trying to halt arguments fairly quickly now, saying a lot to appease bad and move on, and while bad seems to like to start fights for fun, hes also been a lot more chill lately, im guessing because hes been oh-so desperately missing skeppy and big s was also in Baby mode (aka if bad disagreed with him hed probably just cry until he got his way((sand))) i think that vid just showed them being a lot more natural and happy to talk (plus bad usually is more argumentative when theyre competing, while in that vid they were either just hanging out or working towards a common goal) 

n u m b e r f o u r 

where to even BEGIN with discount skeppy. well, bad actually first came up this idea a few months ago, in either july or august on an idots smp stream when he crafted an ‘artificial skeppy’ in his snack shack that he could talk to whenever skeppy was gone. as we all know idots smp is now rip, but the idea of replacement skeppys remained, just this time they can talk and also ship skephalo. it actually seemed like more of puffys idea at first when she put on skeppys skin as a joke, which bad didnt like the first few times, but when she brought it up again he actually requested it (missing skeppy brainrot 🤔?) this could be either cuz bad wanted to bait some shippers so gave in or he thought it was a pretty funny bit so went along with it (or he actually missed skeppy that much.. surely not ??) either way i think we can agree puffy is not only a comedic genius but a top tier friend and slight wingman, and getting some good jealous skeppy content out of it is also top tier. in conclusion, love and appreciate discount skeppy, badboyhalo has only skeppy on his brain and his friends have to deal with that, hoes (skeppy) mad even though the whole bit is how much bbh is into him

NUMBER FIVE im really doing all of them

What, can be said, about ride with u. GODDAMN. im not tryna insinuate anything, but if someone told me that song reminded them of me i would have no choice but to marry them immediately. i really really want someone to ask bad what songs remind him of any of his other friends (dream, sapnap, george, ant, puffy, etc.) because there are three options

1. theyre just cool platonic friend songs and bad is just in love with skeppy

2. he cant think of any songs for them and bad is just In Love with skeppy

3. they have equal romantic undertones and bad is just Like That with his friends (even so i bet people would be picking out the most minute differences between the songs that make one more.. You Know than the other) 

i know FOR SURe that if i was in bads position (where even the person who made the lyric video assumed they were gay in love) i wouldve curled into a ball and never made another public appearance again, but he really owned that shit, singing it and making unprompted references to it (”i already have a bonnie” YOU AINT SLICK SIR WTF) 

i just wanna know if skeppys listened to it (i mean, hes surely at least heard of it, i know he wouldve seen it all over his timeline) and what he thonks about it. pls tell us big s do you also feel the love in this chilis tonight (ALSO when is someone gonna ask skeppy what song reminds him of bad. im waiting ((hed probably say something like a faster remix or something equally memey (((unless???)))

ANYWAY SORRY FOR MAKING YOU READ ALL OF THAT HOLY SHIT i dont wanna reread this to check for errors so it might be incoherent but again ty for letting me infodump about this it was super fun im in love with you anon

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS - CHRISTMAS SPECIAL: 9th December 2018

Geez, today was a busy week. Before we talk about the top 10, however, let’s just get the massive elephants out of the way.

CHRISTMAS NONSENSE

It’s the festive season and one way people celebrate the holidays is by listening to its music – usually, Christmas music, of course, and since I review all returning entries that I haven’t talked about yet, sigh... There are seven of these so I’m going to go as quick as possible, but just bear with me throughout this section because I really don’t like Christmas music all that much. Let’s just get it over with.

#39 – “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” – Brenda Lee

This is “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree”, a song written by Johnny Marks and released in 1958 in the US, being left on the shelf for four years until its release in the UK in 1962. In 1963, it peaked at number-six and has since re-entered due to digital downloads, with one of its highest recent peaks being number-seven last year. It’s pretty inoffensive rockabilly, with some nice very-50s guitar licks coming in throughout, and some decently-sounding production, but really it’s not anything of internet until that sax solo. That solo is freaking gorgeous, and I’m glad it’s there, because otherwise this would just kind of fall to the wayside. Not sure I like Lee’s voice on here, it comes off as a bit nasal, but it’s not a big deal. It’s alright, I guess. I expected to say RIP here since she was popular such a long time ago, but no, she’s still alive and kicking. Good for her.

#36 – “Merry Christmas Everyone” – Shakin’ Stevens

Now this is where it all breaks down into dread. This song by Shakin’ Stevens is Godawful, mostly because of how painfully manufactured the whole thing is. It’s overproduced Christmas music that is just jolly feelings and nothing else. Those horns that kick in after the first verse are pretty cool, but Stevens doesn’t sound great here – or at least I can’t tell because he’s drowned in reverb – and the choir might as well be a computer for all I care. Also, the sax solo was cool the first time in Brenda Lee’s track, but here it’s just trite, especially when you add those shooby-doo-wops over it. This track was initially the Christmas number-one for 1985, and I understand why, but does it really have to come back every year since 2007 – for over 60 weeks in total? Oh, it peaked last year at #10 too. Let’s hope this upwards trend doesn’t continue.

#35 – “Santa Tell Me” – Ariana Grande

Now for a more recent one from arguably the biggest popstar in the world right now, with her 2014 song that actually failed to chart in the Top 40 initially until last year at #29, and that’s its peak so far... whilst I’ve never been a fan of the cleaner, refined Ariana Grande records, I do have a soft spot for this one. That melody is infectious and the sleigh bells complement the synth bass in a way I didn’t think they would, and it’s not like the drums are all that overpowering here, although a trap skitter would have worked better here (yeah, I know, not something I say often). It’s surprisingly romantic and sensual for a song with Santa in the title, actually, although it’s about men who have wronged her. Anyway, Ariana kills it but what else do you expect from a song from her at this point? It’s a good track, although the final chorus with the choir is really cluttered, just saying, it’s messy.

#30 – “It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas” – Michael Bublé

This here is Michael Bublé’s cover of traditional Christmas classic written in 1951 by Meredith Wilson, and it’s not great. Obviously, I mean, it’s Michael Bublé, ever since “Haven’t Met You Yet” he’s been utterly useless seasonal radio fodder. Bublé never really sounds bad but he never sounds interesting, and this production isn’t doing him any favours. It’s sickly sweet strings and brass for the most part, with some piano added in there for good measure, after what seems to be way too long of just airy synth, string and guitar noise – that’s really out of place, guys, why is this on the single edit? Ah, what else to say? Oh, right, nothing.

#26 – “Do They Know it’s Christmas?” – Band Aid

Oh, I know it’s Christmas time, alright, this song won’t let me forget it. I could ramble on about how preachy and awful this charity single is but other people have done it better. I just have four short things to say – 1.) this was the most popular song in the UK of the entire 80s. Yikes. 2.) This is the worst thing the Boomtown Rats have had any involvement in. They’re such a great band, hell so are Culture Club. How do Boy George, the Boomtown Rats, Ultravox, Phil Collins, U2, Kool & the Gang, Sting and Duran Duran make something this awful? They’re all absolutely fantastic musicians in their own right. 3.) That synth that kicks in after a while is pretty ugly, not gonna lie, and is unfitting for the condescending Christmas charity single angle they’re going for here – mostly because that’s what it really is. 4.) We’ve remade and reissued and re-entered this song too many times. Let it go, Britain. Please. We’re begging you. It’s for a good cause, and I appreciate how much money it’s raised, but it’s also garbage.

#18 – “Fairytale of New York” – The Pogues featuring Kirsty MacColl

They use the word because it was the 80s, it’s not meant to mean homosexual and it’s not used in that context – albeit still a negative one – and the climate of Ireland, especially the Celtic punk scene, wasn’t exactly going to care about dropping that slur in their Christmas single. It should still be censored, though, I mean, black rappers saying the N-word is morally okay, but we still mute those, right? Anyway, this is one of the best songs I’ve ever heard. It starts with a beautifully elegant piano melody, with the lead singer of the Pogues, Shane MacGowan, mumbling his way through his verse, but instead of people like Future or Lil Baby, there’s still a lot of sincerity there, I feel, and a lot of soul is put into expressing the lyrics here in the raspy tone that I absolutely love. I’m not going to talk much about the story here mostly because I’m not going to go in-depth, but it’s about a typical love story going awry at some point due to a betrayal. Oh, and the moment the Celtic traditional instruments come in is one of the best moments in music – ever. Kirsty MacColl sounds so lovely here, and the harmonisations in the chorus are fantastic. That flute solo is gorgeous, and the juxtaposition between “you’re a bum, you’re a punk, you’re an old s--- on junk, lying there almost dead as a drip on that bed” and the cheerful instrumental is just hilarious to me, especially since right after “Happy Christmas your a---, I thank God it’s our last” is immediately followed by the bombastic drunk sing-a-long chorus. The third verse is also such a great back-and-forth, man, I can’t even bring to words how much I admire and adore this piece of music. This is the best song I think I’ve ever talked about on this show, by far, but it could have easily not been close if “2000 Miles” by the Pretenders returned this week. We’ll just hope for next week, I guess. Rest in peace to Kirsty MacColl, gone much too young.

#14 – “Last Christmas” – WHAM!

Finally, we have our last Christmas song for this week’s holiday REVIEWING THE CHARTS special. It’s an anti-climactic end, to be honest, because I’m pretty indifferent to this song. It’s pretty 80s, to be fair, so I’ve got to like some of the cheesy falsetto vocalisations from the late George Michael at the start, as well as those repetitive synths that keep themselves from sounding awful by having those sleigh bells and pretty damn nice keys covering them. That chorus is iconic, but the rest of the lyrics are just forgettable. Honestly, it’s a good background song and it’s a well-written, catchy pop track with Michael putting in some good vocals throughout, but, it’s nothing special. Nothing but respect to George Michael, though, rest in peace, he’s a pop legend over here.

Christmas Conclusion

The best Christmas song on the charts right now is easily “Fairytale of New York” by the Pogues and Kirsty MacColl, but an Honourable Mention goes to Mariah Carey for “All I Want for Christmas is You”. Yup, that’s still here, we’ll get to that in a second. Worst of the Week goes to Band Aid for “Do They Know it’s Christmas?” You should be ashamed, Bob. Dishonourable Mention is going to Shakin’ Stevens for “Merry Christmas Everyone”. Other Christmas songs you should check out are “Christmas in Harlem” by Kanye West, Teyana Taylor and CyHi tha Prynce featuring Musiq Soulchild (heck, check out the longer version if you wish), “2000 Miles” by the Pretenders, “Stop the Cavalry” by Jona Lewie, “Christmas Lights” by Coldplay, “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch” by Tyler, the Creator and “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” by DMX. Yes, those last two actually exist. Now, this Christmas section has taken longer and is longer to read than about half of my normal episodes, so I think we should get straight into...

Top 10

Well, this all feels a bit more familiar. “thank u, next” by Ariana Grande is still at the top of the charts five weeks in, and it doesn’t really seem to have much competition.

Ava Max, however, is making a surprise run for the top, up four spots to number-two, with “Sweet but Psycho”. I wouldn’t exactly be complaining if this hit the top either.

“Without Me” by Halsey is up a spot to number-three.

We have a new entry from the most recent X Factor winner, Dalton Harris, with a cover of Frankie Goes to Hollywood’s Christmas classic “The Power of Love”, featuring James Arthur. I guess awful Christmas songs aren’t going away for that long, huh? Obviously this is Dalton’s first top 10, and Arthur’s fifth.

“Thursday” by Jess Glynne is down two spaces to number-three.

Up a whopping 28 spaces this week to number-six is, you guessed it, Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas is You”. This isn’t its first top 10 turn, and it’s not its peak, but still impressive to reach here nonetheless.

This means “Woman Like Me” by Little Mix featuring Nicki Minaj is down five spaces to number-seven.

“Rewrite the Stars” by James Arthur and Anne-Marie has actually gained nine spaces, surprisingly, and to my dismay, to number-eight, becoming Arthur’s sixth and Anne-Marie’s fifth.

Oh, and if you wanted even worse news, up an even larger 29 spaces is “KIKA” by 6ix9ine featuring Tory Lanez, becoming both their first (and hopefully for 6ix9ine, only) top 10 hit at number-nine. I like the song, but I don’t like Tekashi, to say the least.

We have another new entry at #10 this week with “Nothing Breaks Like a Heart” by Mark Ronson featuring Miley Cyrus. This is Ronson’s sixth top 10 hit and Cyrus’ fourth (yeah, I thought she had more too).

Now, instead of separating what happened on the charts into Dropouts, Climbers, Returning Entries, Fallers and such, let’s separate into two sections: “What Survived” and “What Suffered”.

What Survived

What survived means essentially everything that still managed to chart this week, and I’m actually surprised by how much power some of these songs have. Going in reverse order, I have no idea how “Arms Around You” by XXXTENTACION, Lil Pump, Swae Lee and Maluma managed to cling on despite a 17-space fall to #40. “Promises” by Calvin Harris and Sam Smith is down 16 to #38, “Baby Shark” by Pinkfong is down four to #37, “Empty Space” by James Arthur is down 10 to #34 (why did James Arthur of all people have the strength to stay during the avalanche?), “Hold My Girl” by George Ezra is down eight to #33, “Shallow” by Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper is down 27 to #32 (considering both streaming cuts and Christmas bloodbath), “Leave a Light On” by Tom Walker has returned to #31 for some reason, “when the party’s over” by Billie Eilish is down seven to #28 (again, surprised this one’s still here), “Taki Taki” by DJ Snake, Ozuna, Cardi B and Selena Gomez is down eight to #27, “1999” by Charli XCX and Troye Sivan is down 11 to #24, “Polaroid” by James Blue, Liam Payne and Lennon Stella is down 11 to #23, “Let You Love Me” by Rita Ora is down eight to #22, “Better” by Khalid is down five to #20, “Sunflower” by Post Malone and Swae Lee is down seven to #16, as is “ZEZE” by Kodak Black featuring Travis Scott and Offset right next to it at #15, “Funky Friday” by Dave and Fredo is down five to #12, and everything else that’s currently charting is either simply not notable (a drop or climb less than four spaces), in the top 10, a new arrival, a Christmas re-entry or in the top 10. Jesus. Now, what’s gone?

What Suffered

This is a little nicer name for what’s dropped out in the absolute onslaught of Christmas music and new arrivals (all returning and new entries this week total to 12 songs that weren’t on the chart before). This week was an absolute bloodbath, and these are the murder victims. Former #1 “Shotgun” by George Ezra is out from #30, “Advice” by Cadet and Deno Driz is out from #28, “AirForce” by Digdat is out from the #20 debut, “Mo Bamba” by Sheck Wes is out prematurely from #27, “This is Me” by Keala Settle and the Greatest Showman Ensemble is out again from #36, another former #1 “Eastside” by benny blanco, Halsey and Khalid is out from #31, “Happier” by Marshmello and Bastille is out from #32, “I Found You” by benny blanco and Calvin Harris is out from #29, “MIA” by Bad Bunny featuring Drake is out from #35, “Always Remember Us this Way” by Lady Gaga is out from #39, “Goodbye” by Jason Derulo and David Guetta featuring Nicki Minaj and Willy William is out from #40 and finally, “Back and Forth” by MK, Jonas Blue and Becky Hill is out from #37. I’d say it’s time to move onto the New Arrivals – but before, I’d like to say that the BBC redesigned their UK Top 40 page, and it looks pretty cool. Anyways:

NEW ARRIVALS

#29 – “MAMA” – 6ix9ine featuring Kanye West and Nicki Minaj

Of course, DUMMY BOY only had a stunted tracking week last week, so we have the effects of the album this week. This is 6ix9ine’s third top 40 hit in the UK, Nicki Minaj’s thirty-seventh (yeah, I know, it’s insane), and Ye’s even crazier forty-third, and to be honest, it’s inoffensive, which is something I’d never thought I’d say about a 6ix9ine song, but, hey, it is what it is. Murda Beatz’s production is pretty cool for what it is, and I do like the eerie synth loop. 6ix9ine’s delivery is lazy and boring – and I still think we shouldn’t let rappers say they kick women out of doors – but he doesn’t last long so when Kanye comes in with that “man, oh my God” refrain it gets so much better. I’m so used to Kanye West’s pop-culture rambling, social media criticism/obsession, somehow relating to women nonsense he brings to nearly every single verse he does recently that I’m used to it, it’s just something I’ve heard before delivered relatively comedically. Nicki’s refrain and verse actually has some work put into it, unlike the dudes’ bars, so yeah, I appreciate that, although her delivery and cadence is exhaustingly blunt and straightforward, to the point where it’s just kind of tiring. There’s some decent wordplay there, I guess. This is okay enough, and pretty much top-tier Tekashi to be honest. “KANGA” also featuring Ye is even better, though.

#17 – “Going Bad” – Meek Mill featuring Drake

Meek Mill and Drake working together is something I expected to happen anyway. Meek and Drake have seemingly squashed their beef and have relaxed after the “Back to Back” situation and their popular 2015/2016 beef that revealed a lot about Drake, specifically his ghostwriting from Quentin Miller, and eventually stressed Meek’s relationship with Nicki enough for them to break up as a result. Oh, and you better believe they mention “back to back” because of course they do, it’s the only funny wordplay they can conjure up, apparently. This is Meek Mill’s first ever top 40 hit in the UK (congratulations) and in stark contrast, Drake’s forty-fifth (yes, even more than Kanye), and his thirteenth just this year (probably and hopefully his last), and it’s mediocre. I didn’t know what to expect because I’ve never really cared enough about Meek to listen to him, but an out-of-tune piano absolutely demolished by some bass while Drake spouts off with stuff like “I got more slaps than the Beatles” isn’t exactly the best first impression. Is there a chorus here, or not? I can’t tell, everything’s just kind of the same until the ad-lib break that’s long enough for Genius to count it as an entirely different section of the song than in Meek’s verse. It was “Interlude” when I looked but it might be “Post-Chorus” now. Yeah, it should be clear I don’t care enough about this song. I do like Drake’s delivery in the hook, though, it’s pretty energetic, but not enough to save it.

#10 – “Nothing Breaks Like a Heart” – Mark Ronson featuring Miley Cyrus

So, yeah, I like this. It starts with some beautiful strings right before Miley Cyrus fades in with her country twang that I’m starting to really appreciate, and those guitars come in to complement her and the deeper bass that I like the addition of, it really contrasts the otherwise pretty light production, that seems to be dramatic but kind of unfitting for the lyrical content about how the world can hurt you but heartbreak is the worst possible thing, because despite the beat’s melodrama it’s too upbeat to really work here, I feel. Ah, well, the hook is pretty memorable, and the orchestral stings is just one little barely-noticeable production quirk that I can talk about, seriously, Mark Ronson puts so much effort into crafting these songs over the years, it’s pretty great. It may be a bit too repetitive and slow for my taste, but, yeah, I can dig this. Good song, just not much to say about it.

#4 – “The Power of Love” – Dalton Harris featuring James Arthur

The girl gets Leona Lewis, the Scouse dude gets Kaiser Chiefs, yet the WINNER gets James Arthur?! Really, James Arthur? Poor dude. You must know you’re an amazingly talented singer when you get James Arthur put on your song and you still make a surprisingly decent winner’s single, hell, even win in the first place. Arthur is such an awful vacuum of talent, I was scared Harris would be affected by this but no, even with my half-bothering with the show this year I can tell he’s been consistently great, and he’s definitely not bad on here either, although the production has no unique charm to it and is just plastic Syco production as you expect, with James Arthur bringing an above-average performance (this means still pretty bad) with his moaning and straining that just pains me to listen to. Seriously, James, let’s have a cactus-to-man talk and let me teach you how to not sound like my dead cat who just popped some Xanax.

Conclusion

Worst of the Week goes to Dalton Harris and James Arthur for “The Power of Love” – at least “Going Bad” has some energy and legitimate soul to it, although Meek Mill and Drake still get Dishonourable Mention. Mark Ronson and Miley Cyrus take Best of the Week home for “Nothing Breaks Like a Heart”, and hell Kanye and Nicki made “MAMA” bearable enough for them and 6ix9ine to get Honourable Mentions. See ya next week, where we’ll probably see a few more Christmas songs. Delightful.

[myquizzilablog]

100 questions

1. Relationship status: Single 2. Last phone call: Mom 3. Last text message: Azita 4. Last song you heard: Can’t remember 5. Last time you cried: A couple days ago 

HAVE YOU EVER: 6. Dated someone twice: Never really have dated anybody 7. Been cheated on: Nope cheated with 8. Kissed someone & regretted it: Yeah 9. Lost someone special: Yeah 10. Been depressed: Yep 11. Cried over something stupid: I think that we all have

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS: 12: Blue 13: Green 14: Black

THIS YEAR HAVE YOU: 15. Made a new friend: Yeah 16. Fallen in love: With Dakota. Well, at least the idea of him.   17. Laughed until you cried: Yeah 18. Met someone who changed you: Changed a certain thing about me, sure.  19. Found out who your true friends were: I’ve always known 20. Found out someone was talking about you: Don’t think anybody has, I been a ghost this year. Nobody got the opportunity   21. Did something you regretted: I thought I would have, but everything happened as it was meant to. 

YOUR LIFE. 22.How many people on your friends list do you know in real life: As if I’m gonna think too long and hard about that  23. How many kids do you want: I think I might wanna pop out 3-4 but it also depends on my partner. If he wants more or less I’ll take that into account  24. Do you have any pets: 2 25. Do you want to change your name: No  26. What did you do for your last Birthday: Went to soul burger with my loves, got a tattoo, went to Melbourne. I really treated myself this year.  27. What time did you wake up today: 10 AM 28.What were you doing at midnight last night: Going to sleep 29. Name something you cannot wait for: summer beach trips and starting work with the best friend 30. Last time you saw your mother: Today 31. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life: my life is a work in progress slowly going where its supposed to.  32. What are you listening to right now: Meditation music 33. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Yes 34. Who's getting on your nerves right now: No one 35. Most visited webpage: twitter  36. Whats your real name: arezu 37. Nicknames: rose, rosey  38. Last hug: mom  39. Zodiac sign: scorpio   40. Male or female: Female 41. Primary school: liverpool public school 42. Secondary School: quakers Hill High 43. High school/college: Wyndham/TAFE/WSU 44. Write what ever you want here: i’m feelin’ blue and i miss dakota  45. Tall or short: in between 46. Favorite person: dakota  47. Do you have a crush on someone: dakota 48. What do you like about yourself: my compassionate nature.  49. Piercings: none  50. Tattoos: 4 for now  51. Righty or lefty: Righty

FIRSTS: 52. First surgery: i think i was a kid and it had somehin to do with my teeth   53. First piercing: Ears 54. First best friend: sophie and rebecca  55. First tattoo: three dots on my middle finger  56. First vacation: its a bit complicated. was born in iran, moved to turkey living there for a year+, then came to australia. VIC state first place, then moved to NSW state and then... first vacay... QLD yeah.  58. First name: havent you asked me this like three times lol 

RIGHT NOW: 59. Eating: lentil rice mixed with beans/tomatoes and pickles on the side  60. Drinking: water 61. I'm about to: eat more rice  62. Listening to: med. music  63. Waiting for: kota to get online and update us with something & monday. 

YOUR FUTURE: 64. Want kids: Yes 65. Get married: i would love to  66. Career: something in media where i can work for myself. 

WHICH IS BETTER: 67. Lips or eyes: eyes  68. Hugs or kisses: kisses, that leads to fucking without the awkwardness. when i hug a guy i dunno if im at times absorbing their energy but sometimes i get horny and i guess its because they’re horny  69. Shorter or taller: taller plz   70. Older or Younger: a bit older  71. Romantic or spontaneous: Both 72. Nice stomach or nice arms: i’d like a guy who is fit.  73. Sensitive or loud: both 74. Hook-up or relationship: Relationships

HAVE YOU EVER: 76. Kissed a stranger: well kinda. if we’re gonna get metaphorical i’ve kissed men i dont even know that well so yeah in that sense i have.  77. Drank hard liquor: no 78. Lost glasses/contacts: nah just kinda stopped usin’ em   79. Kissed someone your not dating: always 80. Broken someone's heart: probably.  82. Been arrested: no 83. Turned someone down: yeah  84. Cried when someone died: no i laughed my head off  85.fallen for a friend: Yes ❤️

DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 86. Yourself: yes 87. Miracles: i dont know 88. Love at first sight: no 89. Heaven: Yes 90. Santa Clause: yeah but hes not on this planet anymore  91. Kiss on the first date: Yes 92. Angels: Yes

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY: 94. Had more than 1 girlfriend/boyfriend at a time: No 95. Did you sing today: yeah 96. Ever cheated on somebody: with 97. If you could go back in time, how far would you go? if i could only go at the age i am now. either 2004 and i would beg my dad to go see a doctor so that he could catch the lung cancer and i could warn him about the heart disease because of his diet. it would change everything about my life.  98. The moment you would choose: the beginning tbh 99. Are you afraid of falling in love?: kinda 100: did u answer these Truthfully? YES